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A f****n’ gentleman’s game

Publication Date : 06-08-2014


One hopes the heartburning caused by the unpleasant incident between cricketers Ravindra Jadeja of India and James Anderson from England has abated.

The incident has blown over after the ICC appointed Judicial Commissioner Gordon Lewis hearing the complaint against Anderson dismissed charges for lack of evidence.

He said the evidence was insufficient and the sanctions that would have been imposed were too severe. There was no audio or video recording to capture the incident. Therefore Anderson was let off.

Despite the absence of audio or video evidence, Anderson himself admitted in the hearing that he had repeatedly called Jadeja a “f*****g c**t” and a “f*****g p***k” and also that he would follow him to his dressing room “to break his teeth”.

Asked if his remarks were in the spirit of the game, Anderson admitted they were not. This great display of sporting spirit by accepting the truth doubtless weighed heavily with Lewis who therefore exonerated Anderson of all charges.

Indian Skipper Dhoni and his team mates apparently are miffed over the ruling.  They should be reasonable. Anderson’s sporting admission of threatening Jadeja with physical violence should excuse him from all punishment.

As for the use of language, Indian players should acquaint themselves with Britain’s common usage of certain words and make allowance for British culture. Every Englishman uses such language except the Queen. That is why Brits describe royal utterances as “Queen’s English”.

Years ago an incident occurred that accurately reflects British culture. I must admit that I cannot vouch for its authenticity. It appears a man walked into a pub and told the barmaid: “I want a f*****g drink f*****g quick!”

The barmaid demurred and said, “Sir you cannot use such language in this establishment. It is a respectable place!”

“I want no f *****g backchat -- I want a f ******g drink!”

The manager was called and one thing led to another and the matter went to court.  The judge asked the barmaid to repeat what the accused had said. She blushed and declined.

The judge insisted. One man in the audience got up infuriated and shouted. “How dare this f *****r use such language before a f *****g barmaid! He must be f*****g well be punished!”

The judge angrily turned to him and shouted: “Sit down! Who’s the f ******g judge – you or I?”

Dhoni and team mates should appreciate British tradition and make allowance for its culture. They should sympathize with the Judicial Commissioner’s leniency toward a fellow white. After all, sympathy for one’s own kind is only human. Dhoni and team mates may feel hurt but they must accept reality. ‘Coz that’s life, innit, Guv?


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